If you are a pirate like Captain Jack Sparrow then 1) congratulations are in order, those are some mighty big shoes to fill; and 2) you have made it clear that you don’t steal boats....ships...you “commandeer” them.

But the truth is that you can neither pillage or plunder very well--let alone commandeer a ship--without your trusty sword. You are a PIRATE, for crying out loud, so don’t go giving us the whole, “I figured I’d just DIY one at home with some cardboard and tinfoil” nonsense. That will not do. This Pirates of the Caribbean Sword and Scabbard Set, however, will prove the perfect cutthroat companion for any adventure on land or at sea. Defend the Black Pearl or maybe just clean under your fingernails with this licensed lookalike sword--straight out of the films! And when you can adequately protect your stores of treasures and treats, you should never have to ask why the rum is gone. So, obviously, this is a really important accessory for any swashbuckler to wield! We’ll see you in Tortuga.

We know how it goes. You’re just trying to navigate through life, listening to those little voices inside your head. One tells you that you should be investing all of your extra money inside a savings fund, so you can revel in the spoils of your labor many years down the line—you know, like a proper adult would do. That OTHER voice though! It thinks you should spend your money on this totally awesome pirate sword, so you can bring into the office for your next company meeting while shouting, “Avast me hearties! A storm be blowin’. Full speed ahead, ye scurvy dogs!”

It’s tough. Who can say what the right choice is? But we’d just like to point out that this Sword of Triton, officially licensed from the Pirates of the Caribbean, feels like a real dream when you hold it in your hand. You can sweep it through the air and it makes a pleasing “woosh!” sound. It also might control Queen Anne’s Revenge (we’re not sure about that feature quite yet). Just keep all that in mind when those inner voices start telling you what to do.